Therapy for Miscarriage & Infant Loss
Have you experienced the unthinkable loss of a baby?
Do you feel all alone in your grief?
Do you struggle with the pain of watching friends or loved ones welcoming a new baby?
Have your friends and family made hurtful comments like, “At least you can try again”?
It seems like everybody around you is getting pregnant or having a baby, and you’re deep in grief and loneliness. You had hopes and plans for your baby, dreams about your future, and you can’t believe this is really happening. Sometimes you forget for a moment that you lost your child, only to feel reality crashing down on you. Worst of all, it seems like the whole world has moved on when you’re far from okay. Maybe you never shared your pregnancy with others and now you feel you’re left to grieve alone. Or perhaps you had the awful experience of having to give the news of your own loss to others. Your baby should be here in your arms; instead you’re holding the massive weight of grief.
Your Loss and Grief are Real
Learning about your pregnancy is one of the most exciting days of your life. You can’t help but begin to imagine your baby growing inside you and the life he or she will lead. You begin forming a bond with your baby from that very moment and that deep relationship cannot be replaced. When you lose a baby, no matter the age, you grieve a significant, life-altering loss.
Despite miscarriages occurring in about one out of every eight pregnancies, perinatal professionals rarely prepare women. Friends never speak of their losses, family members may be dismissive of the deep pain experienced. Many women experience unspeakably hurtful comments that dismiss the unique and intense bond a mother has with her child from the very moment she learns she is pregnant. Often, even loved ones who want to offer support have no idea what to say and seem uncomfortable with your grief.
You want to feel hopeful, but you don’t know how to get there. You’re in so much pain and you feel so alone. You need a place to process, to grieve, to acknowledge the powerful impact this experience has had on you and your family.
You can be whole again
You will never be the same person you were before your loss. Your experience will change you forever and you already know this to be true in your heart. But you will return to a feeling a wholeness and your grief can become a source of strength and resilience. This is not where your story ends.
Therapy for miscarriage and infant loss is different than other types of therapy. You need a place where it’s safe to feel all of your feelings and you need to be held in your grief. You need a therapist that will listen to your unique experience and validate the pain and anguish of your loss. The last thing you need is to be dismissed and asked to focus on the positive! Only by having your story and voice heard can you truly begin to heal from your loss. Your therapist at Skylands Wellness has supported other mothers like you and will give you as much time as you need to tell your story and process your grief.
Almost every story of loss carries elements of trauma that need to be processed for the mother to be made whole again. We will help you process these experiences with EMDR therapy, narrative therapy, or a combination so that you can tell a new story about yourself. We can’t take away your pain, but we can help you reach the light on the other side of the tunnel of grief.
But you might still be wondering how therapy can help...
I don't want to have to tell the whole story all over again.
You don’t have to. We’re here to listen to your story, all of the parts you want to share, but we’re not here to make you relive your trauma and loss. With EMDR therapy, you can process the traumatic experience without detailing your story. And with narrative therapy, we can help build your sense of calm and safety, so you can say the words you need to say to heal.
Everybody says to just give it time...
Time does not heal ALL wounds. If you feel that you’ve given it time or that your pain is too much to bear, therapy may help get you through the next day, week, or month. Time does have a way of giving us perspective, but so does therapy. You can start to better understand your story now. Only you can determine whether your grief is “stuck” by searching inside. If you’re feeling stuck, confused, lost, or alone, it’s time to reach out for support.
I can't be in a therapy office full of babies, or pictures of babies, or pregnant moms right now...
We know how painful these images can be when you’re grieving a loss. We took this very experience into account when decorating our offices. There are no baby-mother images hanging on our walls. We never schedule you to sit in a waiting room with a pregnant mother or new mother. We take our job to create a therapeutic space for you very seriously and we don’t want to worsen your grief. If leaving home feels like too much, we also offer convenient telehealth sessions.
We want to remind you that women who have experienced the loss of a baby are still in the postpartum period. Your postpartum care is incredibly important to your overall wellbeing, whether or not you go onto birth a baby in the future. Women grieving the loss of a baby can also experience postpartum depression, anxiety, OCD, and mood disorders. Please reach out if you’re concerned about how you feel. We can conduct a mental health screening in you free 15 minute phone consultation.
There is beauty on the other side of grief
You want to see the colors in the world again, but you can’t imagine how you’ll get there. Let us offer support. We offer a free 15 minute phone consultation to discuss your specific needs and how we can help. If you’re looking for treatment for your infant loss, miscarriage, or grief, please reach out today.
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